DUMPLING MANIA + ECTO COOLERS!

HOLY GUACAMOLE, BATMAN! IT'S A NEW YEAR!

We at DINNERGEDDON have been eating, drinking, eating, sleeping, eating, hibernating, eating, washing up, eating, passing out, eating, sleep-walking, eating, and eating more. Many of us are just emerging from holiday food coma - the details of which we will indeed share with you soon.

And hell, look at that picture above. Amey's homemade guacamole looks good enough to lick right off the 'puter screen. But we'll save that for another Mexi-filled episode. Stay tuned.

Right now though, it's a new year. We gotta get down to business with some DUMPLINGS. That's right, we're making homemade DUMPLINGS. This ain't no child's play. We gotta chop till we drop, and fold till we grow old. We need a solid gang. A Dumpling Crew. Someone who knows dumplings. Someone who can show us the way!

Ladies and gentlemen, Awesome Allison Busch:

Allison doesn't just keep the beat going all day and all night. She knows how to make some damn fine eats. And now, she will school us in the art of stuffing delicious ingredients into tiny pieces of delicious dough.

First, we'll need some ingredients. There are no real rules for what can go in a dumpling. You just need flavors that mix well - stuff you want to eat when it's wrapped in dough! We picked up some carrots, mushrooms, potatoes, scallions, cabbage, pepper... We got soy sauce to season and dip in, and sesame oil to cook the dumplings in. Some plum vinegar. Some all purpose flour.

Our master plan: Make two varieties of dumpilngs. A mushroom/carrot/scallion kind, and a potato kind. We plan to steam some, boil some, and pan fry some.

STEP 1: CHOP, CHOP! MIX, MIX!

Super! Now we have our two varieties of fillers.

WAIT! All this chopping and mixing is hard work. We need some liquid refreshment before continuing with this hardcore labor. Time to invent a drink! What happens when you just happen to have a bottle of Dan Akroyd's own Crystal Head Vodka and a bottle of Toronja Mexican soda from the local bodega? You have a delicious and refreshing slime-colored concoction. It's AMAZING! Allison gave it a badass name. You heard it here first, it's the ECTO-COOLER!

Okay okay. Back to Dumplingland.

One can make the dumpling wrappers from scratch, but we opted to leave it to the experts. The asian market had this business:

You can usually buy these Dumpling wrappers in the refrigerated or frozen section of any asian market. Keep them cold right up until you are ready to use them. You don't wanna mess with their delicate constitution.

STEP 2: FILL UP THEM DUMPLINS!

Fill 'em full, but don't pack them too tight. Dip a finger in some water, and moisten the edges of the dumpling wrapper. This will make the dumpling wrapper stick to itself when you fold it up. It's the glue.


When sealing the dumpling up, try to fold the wrapper over on itself, like a fan. This makes your dumpling look pretty. And it probably serves a logistical purpose as well.


Put some all purpose flour on the table or on a plate. Gently coat your dumpling in some flour. Now the won't stick to each other when you line those puppies up!



STEP 3: COOK DUMPLINGS!

Put 'em in a pan with some water and cover and steam 'em! Or fry 'em with some sesame oil!

Or boil them in some water!

STEP 4: PHYSICAL ACTIVITIES WHILE THEY COOK!

That was fun.

STEP 5: EAT!

A special thanks to our pal Allison!

Bubble Tea, Rice, & A Great Big Metal Tube

Do you see that?

That is a damn fine bowl of rice.

That's how they roll at Mr. Noodles, on Queen's Road, Brighton. If you can think of a thing that you would want to have with your rice, then they have already chucked it in there, so don't even bother mentioning it. You'll find what you're looking for. Just eat the damn thing.

You've got chicken, prawns, crabstick, pork, chicken, snap peas, aka: DA WOIKS.



But obviously, there's more to plucky little Noodle-San than simply rice...

For example, there are dumplings to rival those of the highly regarded E-Kagen:



Our crack team of reviewers were split 50/50 as to whether or not these tasty little pillows were in fact BETTER than E-Kagen, although they are slightly cheaper, so that is certainly a great big tick in the Mr. Noodles column.

The general affordability of the food here is really very appealing. The big stand out point though is that it isn't just cheap; it's also really very good.

Behold!



Society will forgive you, in time, for having attempted to lick your computer screen just now. That's the "Mr. Noodles Yaki Soba" and it truly is as good as it looks.

Then there's the obligatory DINNERGEDDON favourite; the yasai katsu curry:



You pair this hearty dish up with a tall glass of crisp Japanese beer (multiple varieties served on the premises) and you my friend will have a party on your hands.

Speaking of parties, have you tried Bubble Tea?



It's wierd but fun. It's essentially flavoured milk (not really tea) with odd chewey balls floating in it. Flavours range from Chocolate, Strawberry, and Banana through to more exotic fare such as Jasmin, Lychee, and Green Tea. The drink comes with an extra-wide straw for sucking up the chewy globules; or "bubbles".



As I say, wierdness abounds, but also..... fun. I would definitely get it again.

The last thing I want to mention about Mr. Noodles is a surprising feat of engineering in the back. Remember that this place is in Brighton, and so for some reason when I saw this it struck me as an extra-authentic "eastern" touch...

Leaving by the back door, you see this:



Wait for it...













Perhaps this reveals something about my personality, but this metal tube made quite the impression on me.



Stay tuned for the launch of our new companion blog, TUBEGEDDON... coming soon!

Significant Dumplings

Imagine this:

You have been shrunk by an evil professor, and are now only 12 inches tall.
The professor is subsequently arrested, but his laboratory equipment is destroyed in the struggle, and there is no way for you to return to normal size.

Are you following me so far?



You must adapt to daily life at such a tiny stature. Most things are fine; you are able to purchase miniature versions of electrical appliances on the internet, and many brands of action-figure offer stylish clothing in your precise measurements. The one thing that seems to bug you the most however, is eating.

You must break everything down into little bite-size pieces. You are unable to chomp on anything as a whole, sitting it atop your tongue and chewing through it's constituant parts. Sure, a friend will be happy to thinly slice little slivers of his chicken-wings down for you to share, but you don't get to sink your teeth into the crispy skin and bite down against the bone. M & M's aren't nearly as much fun when held like a bagel, and slowly gnawed through. In fact, once you have eliminated the colourful sugar-shell, the rest of it is kind of samey.



The thing you miss most of all (or at least I would, if this far-fetched scenario were to ever come to pass) are the Pork Gyoza Dumplings from Brighton's E-Kagen on Sydney Street, that you can see pictured at the top of this post.



DINNERGEDDON fans, we proudly present to you, what are without a doubt, the greatest gyoza we have ever had. If you were in fact 12 inches in height, you would simply not be able to enjoy them on the same level, as the crux of their magic; the warm, loving heart at the centre of this dumpling-creature, is the sensation of them bursting in your mouth while eaten whole. You must be large enough to encompass them fully, if they are to win you over. The reason for this, I think, is that they are greater than the sum of their parts.



That's not to imply E-Kagen only know dumplings... The salmon roe sushi you see above is stunningly beautiful; elegantly constructed, and crazy fresh. These work on a similar principle to the gyoza, as the tiny orange orbs explode with a deeply satisfying feeling akin to Pop-Rocks (remember them?), you'll almost want to hold off swallowing, just to keep the tongue-party rocking. (PS: Perhaps do not use the term "tongue-party" whilst on a dinner-date.)



Look at this guy's face as he eats. Doesn't he look happy? Also, slightly aroused...



That's the lesson to be gleaned from E-Kagen. Food is not just about taste, or aroma; just important as both of those factors is texture, and the tactile pleasure of biting.

OM. NOM. NOM.